The Creative's Couch
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The Creative's Couch
Balancing Passions: Ben Harlow on Acting, Sports Hosting, and Personal Growth
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Ben Harlow, renowned actor and sports host, takes center stage in this episode of The Creative's Couch. From his early days in Birmingham, where he juggled school plays and soccer trials at Aston Villa, to his transformative experiences with the National Youth Theatre, Ben's journey is anything but conventional. His tale is a testament to balancing dual passions—acting and sports hosting. Listen as Ben shares the evolution of his craft, marked by encounters with legends like Roger Moore, and how these experiences laid the groundwork for his thriving career in both fields.
We also explore the intricate dance of self-promotion in today's digital age, particularly through social media. Ben opens up about the initial reluctance many face in sharing achievements online, and how a shift in perspective can turn sharing into a powerful tool for growth. From the importance of being likable and punctual to the simple yet profound impact of a smile at work, we unravel how these elements foster a supportive environment and ease transitions, like shifting from intimate theater settings to the grandeur of stadiums.
Ben's story deepens as he delves into overcoming professional anxiety and embracing an alcohol-free lifestyle. Encouraged by those close to him, this decision has given Ben a renewed outlook, enhancing his mental and physical well-being. We highlight his move to Liverpool, where new creative endeavors await, and discuss how trying new things leads to unexpected growth. Through Ben's eyes, happiness is revealed as a journey of simple pleasures, evolving with age and introspection. This episode promises insight into how personal transformation can fuel creativity and success.
Actor and Sports Host Journey
Speaker 1Hi , I'm Gemma Naylor and welcome to the Creative Scout . Today's guest is the brilliant actor and sports host , Ben Harlow . Ben , thank you for joining me on the Creatives Couch .
Speaker 2Thank you for having me . What a lovely start to the week . Always good to see you Nice and bright in here . I love it .
Speaker 1Just like your personality , Ben .
Speaker 2Well , thank you , yes , especially after a couple of double espressos .
Speaker 1I'm oh but yeah , lovely to see you , so let's dive straight in here . So you started your career at the age of 15 by being a member of the National Youth Theatre .
Speaker 2Yeah , well , I did a load of sport and acting at school , had a fantastic house tutor , tony Hadley , who actually coached a lot of British athletes . He was a great guy , but he was head of drama as well at the school I went to in Birmingham . And yeah , yes , the school shows . I think my first part in a school show I was a corpse .
Speaker 2You know what a lovely war so , oh , what a part Off to a flyer like completely nailed it , gemma , I tell you it was wonderful and nice and relaxing as well , not too taxing on the stretch of a two-hour's bliss , but yeah , then sort of did a few more other little parts at school and then he suggested that I give auditions for National Youth Theatre . We're going , yeah , I was just 15 , auditioned in Birmingham and it was quite a big deal . I had to learn a Shakespeare monologue , so my best Shakespeare . And then , yeah , just went in for a chat with I think it was Ed Wilson , who was artistic director then of the NYT , and a few weeks later got a letter from them Not an email , of course . This is like mid-70s Not quite that early , I'm old , but not that old yeah , and got a letter through and of course , when you're 15 , you get some posts at home . It's like , oh , this is it , you know . And it had National Youth Theatre of Great Britain on the top and said that I'd been accepted into there . Amazing , which , which was great somehow .
Speaker 2So , yeah , I'd spent a summer holiday in London on a course for the first year with some brilliant , brilliant people , and then the second year I got into a production with them it's now , I think , the Peacock Theatre in London , but was the Royalty Theatre . Then they used to use it a lot . I think they used to film this Is your Life there , so just off Kingsway in central London , and , yeah , did the Lionel Barton musical , maggie Mae . For I think it was a three-week run which was brilliant . So , from being this young lad in Birmingham to being in London , not only was I doing what I absolutely loved , but it was kind of where I sort of started to navigate life , I guess , and my confidence grew . You know , I was away from home at the age of 15 in this , in this big kind of big , scary city , but the best part of it was that , um then roger moore , um 007 , of course he was .
Speaker 2I think he was a patron or president of um , of the mit . So we finished the show , went down there , you know , getting changed , and there's a knock on the door . I was like we like I was a bit brummy then so I was like , come in , come in . It was james bond . He just went . Great show guys . Thank you , roger , thank you , um . Yes , that was a great memory , but yeah , just the myt for me , I guess , was where I first realized that one that I think I'm quite good at this but I just feel myself comfortable within a group of people who were like-minded as well .
Speaker 1Yeah , that's really interesting . Obviously you were so young and impressionable at that age , I'm so glad to hear that was a positive experience for you . Yeah , so you mentioned that at school you loved drama but also the sports passion there . So was it straight away from where you go ? You were sort of very interested into these two separate career paths .
Speaker 2Yeah , it's like I kind of chose the secondary school I went to because they were brilliant at sport and they had a really good reputation in drama and I loved my sport . I was a goalkeeper , played cricket , had trials at Aston Villa , got released from them , ended up at Walsall , then down at Kidderminster Harriers but weirdly , I enjoyed playing more with my friends at school . I knew I wasn't good enough to make it as a pro footballer , even though I loved it , but the joke was I'd be playing like Tevye in Fiddler on the Roof on the Friday night at school with the world's worst fake beard then being goal you know , shouting at the defence on the Saturday morning Amazing . But I love both worlds and it was lovely to work , you know , with people who love their sport and you know people who love their creative side as well , and for me it's where I felt comfortable .
Speaker 1Yeah , it's brilliant that you brought both worlds together . Because I always think that's where the really interesting things happen , for creative people is when they bring elements of their sort of true self to their work . So do you mind sharing with us , ben , like how you became sort of an England cricket host , like what was that journey like for you , sure , yeah , with us .
Speaker 2Then , like how you became sort of an England cricket host , like what was that ? Sure , yeah , well , acted for years like a host of brilliant jobs , not so brilliant jobs and of course , between acting jobs you know you still have to pay the bills , so you find those in between jobs . I was a waiter . I was like the world's tallest waiter for years I've got loads of tips good tips , yeah , but also a lot of customers we saw .
Speaker 2Next I'd be like you , ready to order . They'd be like bloody hell . You're tall . But again loved it because you bring your personality and you're almost playing a bit of a role and you know I love people . It was nice to chat to customers and then all sorts . One had an awful um in between job . I was the . I was lending the lion lion , the england mascot at the um at the rugby oh god that was another one , but you do it and you just embrace it ?
Speaker 1Of course you do .
Speaker 2You're usually working with actors or creatives too , so it's always good fun . But I hadn't read the brief for that . So I turned up at Twickenham , really hung over , and I hadn't read the brief properly . So I got there and the supervisor guy was like are you costumes round the back ? And I was like huh . He was like , yeah , you know , you were Lenny the Lion for the day and I was like , oh my God . So I was hungover , put on this Lenny the Lion costume and for that day only Lenny the Lion had human ankles because I was too tall and the costume was too small for me .
Speaker 2But again , you know , you just do it and you get by , especially as a young actor in London , just kind of getting going in life as well . But yeah , and then one job came up and it was to be a brand ambassador at the cricket , so for one of the sponsors of the cricket um , all england games , but not only that . So you had to like sign people up to join I think it was the england fan club . But they also wanted somebody who had some cricket knowledge to host like a lunchtime q a with the legend of the game .
Speaker 2So we had some brilliant like mike gatting , ex-england captain John Embry , and of course I loved it . So again , it was like playing another role . Almost it was like in my head I was like I can do that . You know , I can pretend to be a host for you know , a Sky cricket host and I loved it . And of course it was an environment that I loved . I love the game of cricket a wonderful , so supportive . It's just a nice environment to work .
Speaker 2Um , so did that season , did another season , I think , doing the same role . But then you start to get to know people within the game . I was kind of , you know , thought , well , why don't we sort of have a film crew in the morning ? I'll start filming you know little pieces to camera with fans setting the scene for the day and people . They were like , oh yeah , let's give that a go , that's a great idea . So slowly you're getting to know people within the industry . Slowly they're getting to know you and your personality , that you know you care , you know you're a hard worker and you you know , ultimately , that you're likable and they want to . They kind of want to help you as well .
Speaker 2Um , and then I think I went off and did various theatre tours , so I missed a few seasons and I was always a little bit annoyed at myself because I'd get so far with the cricket and then be like , oh , but hang on , I'm an actor , so of course I've got to take this year's contract , you know , and I think , oh , maybe I should have just said no to that and pursued the presenting a little bit more . But you're an actor , so you get a year's contract and a good show . You know you want to , you know , make your family and friends happy probably a bit more so than yourself sometimes um , so I'd go off and do a tour but then came back and then I started to be employed directly by um , by the ECB , so they just gave me a bit more responsibility and then , yeah , ultimately ended up on the pitch , kind of hosting for the big screen , engaging the crowd . And then , yeah , ultimately ended up on the pitch , kind of hosting for the big screen , engaging the crowd . And then , when the 100 started , which is the new sort of cricket tournament well , not so new anymore , it's just had our fourth year but they asked me to be a stadium announcer , which of course I love because again you're using your acting skills to kind of buoy up the crowd .
Speaker 2You're feeding off the crowd , combining , you know , the state of play with the atmosphere within the stadium as well , and on the back of that , did a good job . Then they asked me to do the Commonwealth Games . So I called the Commonwealth Games final in Birmingham Amazing . But again it's like it's almost like at the start of plays . For me it's like okay , it's like showtime . It's like you , it's like showtime . It's like you know you've got to know enough about the game but you have to bring the skills that I'd kind of learned as a young act that confidence and you know my control .
Speaker 1The showmanship yeah , exactly .
Speaker 2Yeah , you're there to kind of like enhance the atmosphere , to enhance , you know , somebody's it might be their first time at the cricket , so to make it fun and engaging and , um , yeah , so I do that now and I absolutely love it . It's , the people are wonderful . I love the game of cricket and to see more and more young people come to the game as well and to be part of that kind of new influx of interest in the game is is fantastic . Yeah , so it's been another brilliant summer . Um , I've done six test matches and four weeks of the 100 . Oh gosh , and it's just , yeah , cricket a go-go , but I love it and I feel so lucky . But I know that I've worked hard . I was there .
Speaker 1You deserve it .
Speaker 2You know , 10 , 15 years ago signing people up , you know long days thinking , oh , I'd love to have a bit more responsibility . I'd love to have a bit more responsibility , I'd love to do a bit more than just the lunchtime Q&A . So I'm really proud of myself , but it's hard work . You have to keep impressing , you have to be reliable , you have to know your stuff as well as bring your own personality to it . And if you get that balance I think certainly with presenting in anything really , if you can bring a little bit of yourself to it with that experience , confidence and likeability as a person , that's really going to set you up .
Speaker 1Do you find , especially now and it's not a criticism of the younger generation at all , but everything being so instantaneous now , or there's that perception that it is people anticipate they're going to have these great opportunities ? Straight out of sort of full-time training and maybe sort of overlook how important consistency in that you know , continuously showing up , continuously doing a good job and building those relationships , how fundamental that is for long-term success 100 and almost people on that instant gratification don't know , either socially or professionally , and you might get one or two gigs where it's like , okay , I've nailed it , but and that's fantastic and what a great start , that's brilliant .
Speaker 2Generally I'm so pleased for people who that happens to . But it's the longevity and you know that's . I think what 20-25 years of grafting as an actor has taught me is you've you've got to be a good person , you've really got to want it and you've got to be so likeable , almost like think about the entire team of people you're working with , because if you want to be asked back , you've got to fit into that . They might not have a clue about you as a person , but you have to , it's a team player ?
Speaker 2Yeah , you have to enhance their working experience as well . And then you start to get asked back . Then , when you do suggest things because people are warm to you as a person , they're like , oh yeah , we'll give that a go , or that you're nice to be around . They're like , oh , we'd love to have Ben on this tournament or that tournament . So that really helps .
Navigating Social Media and Likeability
Speaker 2But the great thing is , of course , about social media . It's you can advertise yourself . Of course it's taken me a while , and also the confidence , because I don't know if it's an actor's thing , but you know , initially it's like , oh , am I gonna people be like what's he doing ?
Speaker 2like posting a picture of me interviewing like one of the world's leading cricketers amazing but you know , initially it's like , oh , you know , it's for me , it's a job that I love . But you know , I'm not really a boastful person , um , but of course people are getting everything out there straight away , yeah . But then you do learn that it has got a huge part to play in , you know , making contacts and advertising yourself . So you know , I'm nearly 50 , so it's taken me a few years to realize that get your stuff out there , you know , just get it out there almost . You know , I wish I'd had the boldness and the bravery of younger people coming into the industry , because you know , that's , that's great .
Speaker 1I mean , I think this social media is so interesting , isn't it ? Because , like you said , it's sort of advertising yourself . But I know some people who are very successful . They view it as sort of sharing into their world . So , rather than sort of bragging that they were doing something like , no , I'm just sharing it . I'm inviting other people in that weren't there on the day and I find just for myself , I personally find that mindset really helpful increasingly you think you know people .
Speaker 2You know not so much my role at the cricket , but people want to see what happens behind the scenes or who might not be able to afford to go to a game . Or , yeah , you know , have the time , or you know the resources , the resources to go and you know experience live sport that I guess people love seeing different insights . So yeah , that's . That's a really good point .
Speaker 1I mean , you are incredibly likable , ben . What do you think ? This might feel like a difficult question to answer , but you've mentioned as well like being likeable is a huge part of being invited back to , sort of , especially when people are creating new things . What do you think makes somebody likeable or a really good team player ? There are qualities that you've witnessed .
Speaker 2Yeah , I think it's . One is just be punctual .
Speaker 1Yeah .
Speaker 2Time keeping . Be there , be ready , be punctual . Yeah , time keeping . Be there , Be ready , be prepped . Always just go in with a smile , like a little smile at the start of a day . Your team could be knackered , you could be knackered , but a little smile can give yourself a little raise . If you're exhausted , it's like , okay , I'm feeling good , I'm on the front foot here . You can enhance somebody's morning . Just a little hello , a little smile . You know , even I'll go into a ground . I'll say hello to the guy on the gate who probably doesn't want to be there . I'll say hello to the person who's emptying the bins . You know from the trash from the day before , you know the day's play before , and it kind of gives you a little bounce back effect and you get a nice good morning . It's like , oh , that's nice .
Speaker 1Yeah .
Speaker 2And you might have anxiety going into the day's play or into a job or into a scenario , but it all helps dissipate that . I think . Just be friendly , be interested in people , yeah , and just go in . You can't underestimate going in somewhere with a smile and just like a good energy .
Speaker 1Yeah .
Speaker 2Because it doesn't half help , especially if you're working in a team as well and you know , ultimately we work . We want to have a good time . Yes , work can be grinding Whatever you're doing , of course it can . But if you can come away from a day's play or a day's rehearsal , or a day in a recording studio or a day writing , and you feel just happy , well that's great .
Speaker 1That's what we all want , isn't it ? And if you've brought that to other people , it's a beautiful energy exchange , isn't it ?
Speaker 2Yeah , yeah .
Speaker 1You touched on a little something there about sort of not you personally , but just in general when people are working sort of anxiety that can rise . How is it from you going from sort of predominantly ?
Speaker 2a theatre environment where we're looking at sort of 2000 kind of audience members , sort of tops to stadiums , like that must have been quite a leap . It was a huge leap . And my god , I remember the first game I did on the hundred .
Overcoming Anxiety and Alcohol for Success
Speaker 2My anxiety . It was like welcome to the anxiety fun fair . The anxiety dodgems were crashing into each other . The anxiety helter skelter was there . I was so nervous , but then I'd done my prep .
Speaker 1Yeah , you were ready .
Speaker 2And I knew that I'd been asked for a reason . So that was always there somewhere in my head and that gave me that was almost like the spine to kind of combat the anxiety and think , okay , I can do this , but it is , is , and then anxiety is bonkers because you have this awful knot in your stomach but then you announce the first two batters , you get into it , you get the buzz off the crowd and it's almost like you're getting that same spark because you're getting at the end of you know , two hour show , stage show for two thousand people except it's 25 , 30 000 , 30,000 cricket fans . And that gives you such a lovely boost and it's that feeling when you've done the job and you've done it and it's like , oh , what was I worried about ? Yeah , of course I've done it and I've succeeded and I've had a lovely day .
Speaker 2But it takes a while for that to dissipate , even however many games you're doing a season , um , and even now you still get that little knot in your tummy . But that's kind of good because you've got the backing of knowing that that I've done it and I can do it . Um , and it's interesting , I'm alcohol free now , um , but going into work feeling fresh and on it , even if you do have that little knot in your tummy , even if it's , you know , the morning of a panto rehearsal or a casting , or you , you know it's the first game of the season and you're at a packed lords or edge bassin or wherever . It's just knowing that actually , it's literally just a little , a little bit of anxiety or nerves , but that's it , yeah , and you can acknowledge that and you've got the energy to to have a lovely day , you know so you mentioned this .
Speaker 1How long have you been alcohol free now ?
Speaker 2so I've been alcohol free for just over I think it's like 504 days oh god , I'm doing the maths quickly in my head , so it's over . It's over well over a year . Yeah , like I'm . I scraped to see it .
Speaker 2Maths I was rubbish at maths , sorry maths teachers it was always drama or um , or sport for me , not science , or definitely not maths for god , um , but yeah , just over a year and a half I think , and it's kind of like the best thing I've ever done . It's been life-changing , yeah , it's been's been . You know , it's wonderful .
Speaker 1Was there like a moment in your life where you thought you know what I'm going to cut back ? Or was it just a gradual thing , that sort of crept in organically ?
Speaker 2Well , it was kind of nuts really . So just before I went alcohol free , I had a hair transplant .
Speaker 1Okay , so I had my consult .
Speaker 2Oh , thank you . I'm giving it Chesney Hawks , just for you , gemma , more like Pete Stringfellow for the older listeners . But yeah . So I had the consultation and the doctor was like , are you going to have to stop alcohol for four weeks because it thins the blood ? Ah , okay . And straight away . I was like eh , because you know cricket theatre , you know after a show .
Speaker 1Yeah , the social , a couple of pints .
Speaker 2The social side , but also just to wind down and just go oh , and it was always the go-to . So 25 years of that . The cricket world is very sociable . At the end of a day's play you'd be invited out by sponsors and you'd just sit and have a beer . That would be the go-to . But then it went from having fun and my god , some brilliant times on tours drinking just like oh , wow . But then increasingly , as I got , probably about into my 40s , it was because when I was going through tough personal moments in my life it was the go-to . But not to have fun it was in a bad way , to kind of hide , to suppress emotions , so it was a coping mechanism .
Speaker 1Yeah .
Speaker 2And then , increasingly , in COVID , I started to work at an actor's retirement home , a place called Denville Hall , which is a wonderful place , wonderful time there , but very stressful . You know , you take on board , you know quite a lot , and my girlfriend she was working in the evening so I'd be coming home and just having you know one , two beers just for the sake of it , and just waking up the next morning like why did I bother , like I'm just exhausted . And then I kind of knew , and I'd seen a few colleagues from the theatre world , you know , become alcohol free and you start aesthetically . You know people my age , like my god , they're looking good , improvement in their skin , their eyes , just you speaking to their energy levels , their passion for life , for their own creative projects , um , so I kind of knew for about a year that this was something that maybe I should look at . Um , but it's my girlfriend , rita , she and it's my . That was , it was my birthday two weeks after the hair operation okay , so you couldn't drink and I was like what ?
Speaker 2it's my birthday , like I'm gonna have a drink , you know . But it was Rita who said I don't think you're gonna drink again . So she knew me . She knew me that well that she could probably see that I was becoming a little bit worried about it . It wasn't a good thing for me and that my personality didn't need it .
Speaker 2So for years I always thought you know , I'm the party bearer , but it's the true me now that I'm not playing this role of like , oh , let's go to the pub after a show , let's do this , let's do that . And weirdly , it's the best thing I've ever done to have that energy . Um , so Rita knew and it was like my goodness , she was right . And so increasingly you're waking up , you , you just feel fearless , you have energy and , along with the hair , my confidence grew again . All those little creative projects that I had in the back of my head weren't just an idea that I never acted on , because , realistically , how many of us have done that ? Who do that ? Like we'll do this , do that , and it just doesn't happen . But you become fearless and you start to look better , feel better and , weirdly , it's kind of given me more opportunities personally and creatively , because when I'm in a meeting or in a social environment , I'm completely myself .
Speaker 2Yeah that I don't need alcohol to fuel anything , because I'm such , you know , my sort of core setting is happiness . I just want to be happy and make other people happy who come across me like genuinely that I don't need it , and so it's this beautiful place now where I'm waking up . If I am having a bad day or worried about anything which we all do it's just that I've got to combat , not the anxiety that too much boozing can bring . You know , yeah , and it's just yeah , honestly . And I have my little app . You know where I check my days and some days you just forget to check because it's like just normal . Now , yeah , and I feel amazing .
Speaker 1Oh , that's wonderful , Honestly . I feel so full of energy and like drive it's without doubt like the best thing I've ever done for me and for my personality . I think people forget it's so interesting , isn't it , that alcohol is our go-to feel-good thing to do for so many people .
Speaker 1but it's actually a depressant yeah , and I think we all kind of forget that because socially it's just so normal like you say , after a show we'll go for a drink , a networking event there's booze everywhere that you're not necessarily bringing your authentic self to these conversations and these connections and sometimes that can feel really isolating as you go . Well , do they like me , or do they like me after a couple of wives ?
Speaker 2exactly , and what I love and what's great now is that when you are yourself because I know myself so well I'm just myself , yeah , and whatever environment I in of course you have to gauge it , but I'm just myself and if people don't like me , I really don't care .
Speaker 2I can't imagine that anyone would dislike you , ben , but you don't know you don't know , um , and what is lovely , of course , and wonderful the next day . You just know there's nothing to worry about , you can remember everything , you're crystal clear and yeah , you just have , like this morning , it's just to wake up having done four brilliant days at the oval with a test match , and then to have you know what starts the week , chatting to you and another exciting opportunity and moment and experience . And it's just brilliant .
Speaker 1It really is a wonderful feeling oh , that's so good to hear , so let's talk about one of your creative projects that you've got off the ground recently . That's doing excellently your podcast , benji cafe's podcast .
Speaker 2Thank you , it's um
Finding Happiness and Creativity
Speaker 2again . It's been in my head for a while and , um , we've moved up to liverpool for rita's job . Just before christmas we both did pante . Then rita was straight into filming and I was at home . So there's only so many days you can cope with talk . We've got two wonderful dogs by the time . We just had little Harry . He's my little buddy , but there's only so long that I can put up talking to Harry for the day . So I was getting a bit bored and of course you know one needs to work , but it needs to work . Um , but it was because alcohol free , that just like . Well , let's do it , let's , let's act on what I wanted to do for ages . Yeah , but my goodness , you know I'm not technical .
Speaker 1I don't think many creatives are no , it doesn't always go hand in hand , yeah so literally the process of learning , because it's just me , you know .
Speaker 2I produce it , I host it , I research it , I drop it every week .
Speaker 2Um , it took me a while to get my head around the right software , how to do that , but that I knew the talking side , I'd be okay . Um , but that feeling when you drop the first one and it's up there against my favorite podcast , um , it's like that sense of achievement again . It just gives you such a wonderful spark and a boost and it's great . So the catalyst was becoming alcohol free . So if the guests want to talk about being alcohol free not everybody's alcohol free at all , but ultimately it's just a lovely 40 minute listen to raise a smile , just just a nice message to kickstart somebody's day or week . That it's just a really relaxed , easy listen and I suppose that's the message of the podcast just say hello to somebody because you do not know where it might lead to . If you have a chance to try something , do it because even if you think at the end of whatever experience it is , that this isn't for me , you've tried , but 90% of the time you'll get something from it .
Speaker 1What do you think it is about ? Because you touched on it before just saying lots of creative people have these ideas , but they procrastinate and sit on things for years . What do you think it is that stops creative people moving forward with their own ideas , in your opinion ?
Speaker 2Ben , I think a lot of it could be and I did it for years .
Speaker 2The worry about especially living in london anywhere actually is the reality of paying your bills yeah , because we all need to pay our bills and that I had a period where I was working so hard on like sales jobs , promo jobs , restaurant jobs , where that became the priority , so I was getting to auditions or castings . I'd be here like not even thinking about my performance in an audition , my performance in an interview or a casting . It was like the relief of getting there on time , knowing that I'm not going to lose my in-between job .
Speaker 1Yes , you're surviving .
Speaker 2Yeah , just surviving , and you're forgetting that creative side of why you're on this planet , why you've trained , why you've worked so hard to give yourself the best opportunity of doing what you do , and so , yeah , I think that's really key . I do think that's key .
Speaker 1Yeah , it's always interesting , isn't it ? Because I know so many wonderful creative people who never move forward with their own ideas and are always waiting for someone else to give them the validation that they're good enough to work in the industry and I'm like make something yourself .
Speaker 2Yeah , well , that's so true , and if you do take that little leap of faith in yourself , you've tried , and that's a moment to give yourself a huge pat on the back because you've given it a go . Even if it doesn't work out , you'll get something from it . Yeah , and that's isn't that like such a reoccurring theme just give things a try , you'll get something from it . You could meet somebody fantastic . So just yeah , the financial side is . But if you can get that balance and just even if I mean I've done jobs where it's like literally stood outside office rooms for the day talking to a wall , just like , oh my God , in the Lenny the Lion suit with human ankles hung over as anything .
Speaker 2But if you can keep hold of what makes you happy creatively and as a person , keep hold of that because ultimately you'll get to a moment where your finances might improve a little bit and it just gives you that little bit of confidence to go with a project that you want to give your time to .
Speaker 1So it's so interesting , like clearly a theme for you is happiness . What is your personal definition of happiness ?
Speaker 2I think it's being able to sit down , enjoy a coffee in the morning and feel content , knowing you've got a loved one and some family and friends that if you need anything or you just want to say hello to , you'll get a lovely hello back oh , that's beautiful and I've been through some tough times like super low , and it's so love .
Speaker 2It's like almost just feeling calm , calming yourself because you've jumped through so many hurdles to find who you are personally and professionally . And happiness is it's just for me just being able to sit with a coffee , people watch oh god , I love a good people watch , you know , even when I'm sat with Rita and we love our little morning coffee . We're so old , but it's just being there , either with somebody you care and love , physically next to or at the other end of the phone , even just knowing that support is there and that love , because they love that person you are and who you've become . You know it's just feeling calm , just being calm in life . I think that to me that's happiness .
Speaker 1Do you think that's something that's easier to find as you get older ?
Speaker 2I do , yeah , because you've learnt who you are and you've probably gone through , know , some tough times , but you're , you're surviving . We were waking up in the morning and isn't that beautiful that nothing bad's gonna happen . We've probably both had awful times in our lives . People listening probably have or going through tough times , but it always gets better and if , if you're so true to yourself , that's like a massive catalyst in your happiness as well , because you know that you , you're living every day as the person you're meant to be , and that's that's great as well .
Speaker 1Oh , it's been so lovely to chat to you , ben , just before we finish . What sort of advice would you give to yourself starting out in your career ? If you were to speak to you know , 18 year old ben , now what ? What would you tell him ?
Speaker 2don't be worried about being yourself , don't be worried about getting rejection and also just keep smiling , because that will open , honestly , will open so many doors to you . But just just know that the person you are is is good and you're obviously creative and have all these sparks and drives because that's what you want to do . So go for it . Life is too short and again I learned that in the care home . Like this , this will all slowly grind to a halt . That's reality . So why not ? Let's just enjoy it whilst we're here . You know , yeah , and smile and be happy and you'll get that back and you'll wake up on a Monday morning like me and be like life's good , life's good amazing .
Speaker 1Oh , thank you so much , ben Harlow .